ode to lost children of gap ads

there was a time
when I was about four
when commercials were great
i'd watch them on the floor

mikey liked it !
and squeezin the charmin
of which poor mr whipple
saw no harm in

the images were true
in flaccid hues
these boxy people
who sold hush puppy shoes.

but the past is gone
wiped out, decayed
and in its place
is the shiny plastic people's brigade

they lead the front
they need no map
for satan leads them
to fall into the gap.

their smiles are bright
but the eyes are saggy
lead by a gulf war veteran
by the name of shaggy

they see no harm
in suckling from the tit
of a corporate bohemoth
while singing "give a little bit"

ferrell, cheadle,
robertson and Phair
that guy from googoo dolls
with the bon jovi hair

they all have left
their minds are no more
they've shilled to the gap
to receive a fanny that's sore