my promise of commitment to quality to you the (lone) reader in the upcoming year. I also feel bad I haven't posted in a while. I'm sorry ezra. off to san francisco I am so happy new year everybody.

back.
and you knew I would be, jesus christ I'm kool bobby p

happy.
as a young chap with his beak in a can o red bull.

determined.
I'll pound your forehead with my kool bobby style, then set you up
with my own generic version of a loritab while I rub your feet with my miagi hands.

speed.
check the traction as I round your corner. no screeches. check it.

agility.
like a globetrotter if a globetrotter wasn't playing basketball but instead decided to write a stupid
blog. but he couldn't write about basketball either, if that's ok with him. not writing about basketball
being the only clear restriction imposed upon him (or her).

talent.
like a show. except I'm not in it per say, but I can and will M.C. the event if the scheduled MC gets
sick and can't make it.

respect.
if your mom was here I'd call her mrs. in front of her last name, even if she said to call her norma or
claire or faye.

clarity.
I will fog up your mental mirror with my brain shower, then wipe it away with my grubby hand,
revealing your grinning mug.

peace.
clean sweeping the drunken evil doer guy at the bar and then putting him in the body bag, johnny.

lotsa yappin on the wattlist about year 2002 and all things palindrome

happy holidays ! hope yours has been and will be as warm and fulfilling as mine. if it's not, try a little booze. or a lot.

Cryptogramophone. they updated their site since I linked it yesterday. what a difference. go and listen to the first song on the cryptoradio. it's the nels cline singers, featuring scott amendola on drums. I'm a fan of amendola's ferocity and precision on the kit. he sat in with charlie hunter when Hunter remade bob marley's natty dread. this song is jazzy punk with a jungle speed rhythm. dig it.

before I go...

carson daly finally gets his own talk show on nbc. it's called -- " last call with carson daly ". you know, cause he closes down the bars all the time with his insane blend of partying and lady-killing "carsonisms". the concept is unique and definitely something he can pull off- he interviews himself every show in front of a mirror. you won't believe some of the daring questions he asks himself!

finishing up projects and uncluttering the clutter before I leave for the holidays tomorrow. I should keep posting from the road, and until then, adieu to all two of you and may your socks stay warm and dry.

scared of avant garde music? scared of instrumental music? does the name nels cline mean anything to you? if you answered yes, you shouldn't go here and click on cryptoradio. don't. seriously.

sex pistols reuniting to once again crash Queen's party. these guys are old now aren't they. so's the queen. the quote at the bottom gets me --

``The good thing about the Pistols now is that they can really play,'' Giddings said

perry farrell, freedom fighter. quite an amazing story I heard about from the watt list yesterday.

simpsons philosophy and religion class offered at siena heights university in michigan, home of the fighting... ..people who kick ass

what the hell happened to conan's old website? the new nbc -ified page sucks menuts. where's the clips? the bits? the fun? all that's left is this sucky page..
annie told me she couldn't find the page a few weeks ago , but I quickly filed that under "crazytalk" , as she is both british and gay.

Biotech Giant Amgen to Buy Immunex
well this certainly surprised everyone, especially with the holidays upon us. geez, with all the negotiating and the back and forth and the number crunching, who would have ever thought in wartime that amgen would ever go for immunex.
I can't wait for the merger party. I'm going to wear a silly hat.

I put this lengthy post in yesterday about how I was working on the exorcist and how I had all this interesting trivia about the actual case of the exorcism blatty based the exorcist book on and about the 9 deaths surrounding the filming of the movie, but the webpage people lost my page. those stupid fuckers. those ignorant and subversive bastards. they're not really, but they make me say mean things when they do stuff like this. It's easy for me to fly off the handle like this when it's all too evident our relationship is going downhill. look I haven't slept well at night. It may be time to face up to the fact that parting ways may be best. but you go ahead and tell them that and they'll be like " oh yeah we feel the same way" but if you look into their eyes you can tell their lying because they keep looking down and to the left.

LA is strange.
walked out of laemmle sunset 5 theatre yesterday after seeing Royal Tenenbaums, which was completely brilliant. I promised myself I wouldn't go on about what a great piece of film this is, so there. but as I walked out, dusk was near , and the sky was patchy between the fierce reds and oranges of sunset and towards the hills was thick clouds but in between there was a deep blue sky that highlighted all of the homes on the hill facing us at the theatre. then almost directly over the hills that are facing us, small white strips of clouds / fog were seeping into join the bigger masses of gray clouds gatheringjust next to the bright fire colors of sky just next to it. everyone was just standing and looking at the sky. it was beautiful. then, I go downstairs to sam ash music store and as I walk into the drum section there, of course, is ben stiller - 15 minutes after watching his great performance on screen, I watch as he is about to purchase an electronic drum set at sam ash. he played it for a while too, not bad actually. I told him to stick to the acting. ( no you didn't!) oh yes I did ( no you didn't) oh yes I did ( no you didn't) ok I didn't.

heather's friday poem kicks mine in the ass. so does ezra's. I should really break out of my 3rd grade rhyming schemes.

wow, check out the pic of these lebanese men. they may not believe the video tape is legit, and who can blame their paranoia after seeing the size of that hooka.

friday poem

(my apologies to everyone here at Holy Crap! for starting this whole friday poem thing)
(my apologies to everyone else in advance of reading this)

view from a street light
circles the ground
lying in the midst of the ring
is fagan the blue tick hound

he don't move much
he just lays right there
sometimes he'll lick his nuts
but usually he'll lay and stare

we named him fagan
cause of that guy from steely dan
who had named his group
after a big dildo, man!

fagan was old
decrepit and blue
he was an older model
from 1982.

he shoulda been gone
a long time ago
how could he live so long
under the night lamp's glow?

one day we decided to see
if fagan could stand
we snuck behind him
and interlocked our hands

we tried to lift
he let out a sigh
we felt something wirey
this one kid started to cry

just then flashing bright lights
all in the blink of an eye
a spaceship had surrounded us
and lit up the night sky

they were canine aliens
every one of them white
they were looking at fagan
they were ready to fight

but fagan didn't want that
fagan kept 'em at bay
then up to my leg
he waddled and did say

thanks for the care
and for the bones and meat
by the way tell that tabby cat
her poo tasted sweet

this fagan must leave for the stars
and on this dog ship I must fly
to commandeer the troops
towards the next battle cry

you see the dogs are at war
with evil all over
you thought we were just toys for your planet
to be petted and called rover?

we run the galaxy
and have for some time
by the way bobby
why are we speaking in rhyme?

well, it's poem friday I said,
if you really must know
and thanks to your story
the day won't move as slow

for workers sittin in their cube
trying to pass their days
maybe they'll like this poem
about your canine alien ways

I hope so! said fagan
and with a bow he turned
and entered his spaceship
while the engines began to burn

there I stood, frozen,
on the ground alone at night
my friends still there
but only I glowed under the ring of street light.

this poor former georgia tech football coach lied about being on the football team in college. shitty thing for him was that he was caught one week into being hired as head coach at Notre Dame, so he had to "resign" his position one week into his new job.

hey let's do a punchline poll:
should the joke center around-

a. the irish
b. dumb football people
c. tying in the fact that I haven't gone on a date for a while now.
d. jeff saunders

mike watt sent a link to this Nirvana site. finally dave and kris filed a counter suit against love for her trying to control all the nirvana releases and subsequently blocking them from putting out a box set with unreleased material. maybe she's a scientologist too.
here's a snip and quote from kris -

" Finally, Nirvana's surviving members Krist Novoselic and Dave Grohl have started to fight Courtney Love's crusade to control Nirvana's legacy; "Rock star Courtney Love carved out a new identity for herself this year as an artist-rights activist, ranting about greedy corporations that she claimed cheat bands out of royalties and try to steal their music. But that crusader image suffered a blow Wednesday when the remaining members of the grunge band Nirvana sued Love, accusing the widow of bandmate Kurt Cobain of trying to seize control of the trio's recordings for her own financial gain.
'We'd have a lot easier time accepting this Joan of Arc music industry crusade if it wasn't coming from somebody trying so hard to hold the two of us down,' said Nirvana drummer Dave Grohl, who with Nirvana bassist Krist Novoselic filed a breach-of-contract lawsuit against Love in King County Superior Court in Seattle. The legal action is a response to a suit Love filed in May seeking to take charge of Nirvana's catalog and block the future release of any Nirvana recordings by Novoselic, Grohl or Vivendi Universal, the French music conglomerate she is battling to break her own recording contract. Love's suit puts the brakes on a greatest hits package originally scheduled to hit stores during the Christmas season. 'Dealing with Courtney is like getting stuck on a mean street where somebody is always trying to pull a cheap hustle on you. It's an indignity,' Novoselic said in an interview. 'We're just holding our noses through this whole thing.' "

in my first (of possibly few) baseball installments, let me just say that I hate that giambi went to the yanks. the braves could have used this guy, but instead they sign matt freakin franco. damn. the braves are apparently too busy celebrating the fact that terry pendleton is the new batting coach than to worry about anything silly like next season.

google released an archive section that chronicals 20 years of usenet groups on the internet. it's interesting seeing the first mentions of microsoft, ibm os , and of course, the gratutitous star wars mutterings.

Maverick's is on. thanks ezra. jeff first showed me these insane waves and the people who surfed them from a video he was editing at his job back in 98. I still think about it frequently- the waves, the balls on those who attempt it. quite inspirational.

I don't normally get into the whole celeb gossip thing too much, so I may be showing you something you knew, but as I was doing research for the contract TNT gig (today's movie is edtv ) I came across this interesting bit about jenna elfman, the actress who plays dharma in dharma and greg. I don't know the show, but after watching her in edtv I was pretty interested in her, that is, until I read this. now I'm just interested in her like one would be interested in people who say the dumbest shit and you can't figure out if they can actually mean what they said 'cause there's no fuckin way I could ever imagine anyone I know saying something even remotely as not only ignorant but ridiculous and completely insulting as what this out of touch bimbo says.
from IMDB-
" When asked why she wouldn't sign autographs for a celebrity auction for children with HIV, Elfman stated that she couldn't support any organization that raised money for AIDS research or relief because 'AIDS is a state of mind, not a disease.' "

what kind of idiots could possibly brainwash her into thinking this way. she obviously isn't bright enough to concoct such warped sense of nonthinking, but she is smart & rich enough to assimillate into a wonderful "new" concept of "mind - thinking", y'know , like

mindhead.

to me it reaks like a fresh mound of............... bullshittery.

thanks to an overgrown , abcessed, festering, huge, and quite smelly lump of dirty clothes in my closet, kool bobby is now suddenly laundrymat bobby, which ain't nearly as kool. it also keeps me from posting to the korner, which makes you, the lone reader, suffer. I'm terribly sorry for any inconvenience. hey maybe you can just go to mat's always up-to-date page ; ok, he's gone fishing apparently. fishing and laundry, two things you would not associate with cool. uh........ hopefully jeff or ezra can save us. well jeff, at least...

LATimes article about saturday's "class of 77 " punk reunion show at the el rey. watt and george hurley represented the minutemen and cherie currie and sandy west of the runaways played cherry bomb. no joan? this "reunion" certainly won't get annie's endorsement ...

allow me to give a quick shout out to a definite california favorite of mine:
trader joe's . it's a market and grocery store and discount food supplier that is stocked with alternate varieties of almost everything, most of which is made and packaged by trader joe's themselves. example of trader joe's products I can't stop eating: spicy hummus ( I want to kick somebody) , chicken enchiladas (addict), very berry clusters cereal (more like very berry fuckin yummy ), frozen calamari rings ( roomate turned me onto this frozen treat - I sautee then add to trader joe's marinara for the pasta route). their products are also free of most pollutants, additives, chemicals, and they stay away from hormone injected cattle farms. if you're from atlanta this place is like a combo of harry's in a hurry and sevananda but cheaper and twice the yum.

over the weekend my grandfather, dave, turned 80. it was great being able to talk to him. I am grateful that he, as the last remaining grandparent for my sis and I, is still here. he had a defibrillator put in his chest (like dick cheney) some 6 years ago. it has saved his life more than once. (" it feels like a lightnin' bolt through your ass!") . If it weren't for that contraption he wouldn't be here, which is something I had to wrestle around in my head for a while: a medical contraption, surgically placed, that kicks in and shocks your heart back into beating at the first notice of a heart failure. (is he bending the rules of fate? is he altering where his soul lands in his next life?). either way, he is still happy and active. he plays golf and still shoots below his age. really.
he was in the navy for 30 years and I have heard a couple of his stories, and I basically knew the timeline of when he served and where he spent most of his time, but with the current situation I think he felt closer to those old days and he talked for a while about what he did and where he went. I sat with pen in hand, utterly fascinated with his stories and tried to jot down the names of the ships where he spent time - whether it was in africa, panama, or in pearl harbor ( he wasn't there then, he was transferred out of pearl harbor just a couple of months before it took place. )
one of the stories he told was about a drunken captain navigating the ship through a leftover WW2 minefield. they hit an acoustic mine, and dave was thrown a few yards and banged up pretty good.
another tale centered around plotting out airfields in china by plane while a heat seeking missle accidentally fell into a field without detonating.
afterwards I grabbed the paper where i took notes and hopped online to trace these ships. it was very easy to find. this ship is the one that went through the minefield, and this one, the philadelphia, was where they ran top secret missions into china.

today beakdip banters about a southern classic: sweet tea.

hey we both wrote poems today - what a coinkydink!
should friday be poem day?

ode to lost children of gap ads

there was a time
when I was about four
when commercials were great
i'd watch them on the floor

mikey liked it !
and squeezin the charmin
of which poor mr whipple
saw no harm in

the images were true
in flaccid hues
these boxy people
who sold hush puppy shoes.

but the past is gone
wiped out, decayed
and in its place
is the shiny plastic people's brigade

they lead the front
they need no map
for satan leads them
to fall into the gap.

their smiles are bright
but the eyes are saggy
lead by a gulf war veteran
by the name of shaggy

they see no harm
in suckling from the tit
of a corporate bohemoth
while singing "give a little bit"

ferrell, cheadle,
robertson and Phair
that guy from googoo dolls
with the bon jovi hair

they all have left
their minds are no more
they've shilled to the gap
to receive a fanny that's sore

there are still pirates on the planet?

do you like danzig? how 'bout the misfits? evil music and evil things? evil do-ers? how about super evil miniature toy replica's of the misfits ?

from wattbot.

I'm not as cynical about America's taking to the flag as other folks. nationalism scares me, and the patriotic dish soap commercials really piss me off, but people need something to tie us together right now. I have no problem with that. i do, however, have a problem with websites like this .

note - It would be fine if it wasn't for that damn lee greenwood and his song that I am convinced is filled with hidden, subversive propaganda. listen to it and tell me you don't feel like punishing someone severely.

at first you'd think, like I did, "oh no, neil young doing a 9/11 song. neil why?" but his magic gets ya. he has such power in his words and music that damn if he doesn't turn you like flapjack. this guy could make a song about insurance forms and we'd all buy it. this is titled lets roll

annie and I are obsessed with this....thing. she lives in new york and keeps her eyes open everyday, hoping to run into this half breed poultry monster.

this is a great site by a friend of mine mike anderson. his crazy wife jenny and I performed at whole world theatre in atlanta together. be forewarned: insanely nutso shorts inside. mike makes films and is currently in negotiations with some different big wigs to buy up his scripts and ideas, like Redneck Vampire.

from my main Larry Annie
- it's great when you can quote yourself in your own signature file.

~"we walk alone in life,
whether we have a husband or a wife,
it cannot take away all our strife,
but neither can going crazy,
with a knife."
Annie Humphrey.

In your best Johnnie Cochran voice--
"Ladies and gentlmen, the juice is not gay, and furthermore, he did not deal the MDMA"

How you say ............movie deal?

Mat's pics from Jeff and Ezra's party. They look really happy !?!

"You know, I've been doing this for 12 years and have reported some pretty scary things. But I get this sense that the world is changing and it's gonna be bad for a while. I guess every generation goes through this. Our parents must have felt the same way in the 60's when King and the Kennedys were killed, and the nation was in the middle of an unwinnable war. A wave of ultra-conservatism was sweeping the nation and civil rights were forgotten. It's just weighing me down, because I'm hoping to start a family, but I don't even know with the economy how it is, that I'll even have a job in two years. "
-- from a friend "in the know".

after seeing the recent suicide bombings in Israel ( and counter bombings in Jerusalem,) I seriously started feeling this same way over the weekend. no, not about starting a family; about the fact that things are really going to get bad for a while before they get better. all over the world. I'm not going out to the street corner with billboards proclaiming the end is near, but I think fighting around the world will continue to escalate.

what does excite me from all this "evil" is that generally it seems that our culture, in terms of new ideas, and energy--basically creativity--- heightens around uncertain times ; times of strife. This is when revolutionary ideas, creations, and ways of thinking start to grow.

a creative buzz is starting to resonate. what will you do?

I'll tell you what I'll do--
right now I am going to have another cup of coffee. would you care for one too?

(rhyming not completely intentional)

IT is Segway

that damn ginger thingy (IT) will finally be unveiled on Good Morning America Monday morning.

Mat's piece today on the influence of REM, and the realization that we all are artists.

today is AIDS day worldwide. it's an interesting coincidence that the movie I'm working on now for my freelance gig at TNT is Philadelphia, Jonathan demme's 1993 film about AIDS and homophobia. I've come across a few interesting stats regarding the cessation of AIDS in some demographic regions in the States, which is good, but there are now disturbing figures about it's rapid growth in Eastern Europe and Africa. this CNN article shows these staggering new figures.

there is one person I know who is HIV positive. he's also battled cancer recently, and so far it looks like the chemo and other radiation therapy has destroyed the cancer. what I've seen from this person, through the cancer and his living with HIV has been nothing but courage and upbeat vibes. the chemo knocked him out for a while, but he's since recovered and responded well, partially or mostly I believe because he refuses to let his illness touch his soul. he's an inspiration to me and all of his other friends who have been fortunate to be around him. God Bless you Thomas.